So, you're just coming to terms with fear of buttons, when another potential phobia rears its terrifying head. Anatidaephobia.  The fear of being watched by a duck.

My lovely fan, Eliza Wimperis, has alerted me to this word/concept/life-threatening mental illness, and I can't quite get it out of my head.  Why a duck? as the Marx Brothers might say.  I feel quite strongly that all those Americans waving the flag for intelligent design should be confronted, forcibly, with Anatidaephobia.  So, let me get this straight.  A greater being created the duck, then the human, and then in a moment of divine whimsy....well, need I go on?

You can see why the idea of writing a book on the subject of God as a mad mercurial teenager appeals to me so strongly.  The evidence is everywhere.